AdvicesRelationships

19 Obvious Signs She is Pretending To Love You

If you’ve ever wondered if your partner really loves you or if they’re just pretending, you’re not alone. 

Love is a powerful emotion that can make us feel invincible, but it can also cloud our judgment and make us overlook some obvious red flags. There are many signs that someone may be faking their feelings towards you, and ignoring them could result in disappointment and heartbreak. 

In this article we’ll reveal 19 of the most obvious signs she is pretending to love you so you can protect your heart and make sure you’re in a relationship that’s based on true love and respect between you two.

The idea that someone you care about is lying or pretending to love you is not something we want to think about. Unfortunately, it happens more often than we would like to admit. When it comes to a friend, family member, or romantic partner, it can be hard to tell if they’re really loving you or if they’re just pretending. 

When someone loves you, they’ll want to give back and show you that they care. If the person never expresses any real sentiment or doesn’t seem to reciprocate when you reach out to them, this could be a sign that they’re not actually in love with you. 

It can be hard to tell if someone is pretending to love you, but it’s important to be aware of the signs. Pay attention to how the person is acting and take note of any red flags. If you think someone is pretending to love you, it’s important to trust your gut and talk to the person about it. It’s important to make sure that everyone involved is being honest and open about their feelings.

Let’s look at 19 signs to look out for if she is pretending to love you.

1. She doesn’t put any effort into your relationship.

One of the most telling signs is if she doesn’t put any real effort into your relationship. If a woman is truly in love with you, she will likely take the time to show it by going out of her way to make the relationship work.

On the other hand, if a woman is pretending to be in love with you, she likely won’t make any real effort to keep the relationship going. 

She won’t put in the time to plan dates or to do anything special. She won’t make any real effort to spend time with you or to show that she cares about the relationship.

2. She doesn’t listen to what you say

Another common sign that she is pretending to love you is if she does not listen to what you say.

When someone truly loves you, they want to know everything about you. They want to hear your thoughts, your opinions, and your stories. 

They want to get to know you better, and they will actually listen to what you have to say. 

However, if your partner is pretending to love you, they may not take the time to truly listen to you. They may seem distracted, or they may have their own agenda when it comes to the conversation.

3. She doesn’t show any signs of affection

If your partner is pretending to love you, they probably won’t display any affection towards you. 

This may include snuggling on the couch, holding hands, kissing, or even just a hug when you see each other after a long day. If she’s not being physically affectionate or emotional, then it’s possible that she may be pretending to be in love with you. 

4. She’s always too busy for you

Having the feeling that your partner is always too busy to see you when she does have time to do so may be another that she isn’t really in love with you at all and is pretending to love you. 

The fact that she is never available for date night, hanging out with friends, or just to spend quality time with you, is an indication that she doesn’t really care about you that much. 

5. She avoids talking about your future together

If you’ve been in a relationship with someone who constantly avoids the subject of your future together, that might be a sign she’s not as interested as you thought.

There’s nothing wrong with living in the moment, but if your partner hasn’t been discussing the future as a couple, it might be a sign that she’s not as passionate as you about your relationship. The comments you hear about not thinking too far ahead, or “Let’s just see what happens”, should serve as a warning.

The fact that your partner avoids talking about your future together indicates that she may not want to be a long-term partner. The fact that the topic of marriage or living together hasn’t come up in months or even years could indicate that she is not in the same level of commitment as you are.

6. She’s not interested in getting to know you

If she’s not interested in getting to know you, it’s a sign that she might not be that into you. Sure, she may be interested in going out to do activities together and spending time with you, but if she’s not making any effort to learn about who you are as a person, this is a warning sign that she’s not really into you. 

If you’ve been together for a while and she still doesn’t make any effort to get to know you better, this is a definite red flag. She shouldn’t have to be compelled or reminded to get to know you; if she’s truly interested in the relationship she should make the effort to learn more about you. If she’s not, this could be a sign that she’s not really into you and is just pretending to love you.

7. She’s always defensive around you

When it comes to relationships, it is normal to have disagreements and arguments. However, if your partner is always on the defensive when it comes to you, this could be a sign that they are not being completely honest with their feelings. 

When someone is pretending to love someone, they are often trying to avoid any confrontation or awkwardness. 

So, if your partner is always defensive around you, they may be trying to cover up their true feelings by avoiding the subject altogether. It is possible that they do care about you in some way, even if they are not willing to express it. 

8. She doesn’t initiate contact

She doesn't initiate contct

One of the most telling signs that she’s pretending to love you is if she never initiates contact. If you’re the one always reaching out, it could be a sign she’s not interested in the relationship. While it’s normal to take turns in initiating contact, if it’s all one-sided and she never proactively reaches out to you, it could be a sign that she’s not actually in love with you.

This might be especially true if she used to reach out to you more often in the past. If she’s going out of her way to avoid contact, it could be a sign that she’s not as invested in the relationship anymore.

If she never initiates contact, it’s likely because she doesn’t feel the same way about you anymore. It doesn’t mean she doesn’t care about you; it could just mean that she’s not in love with you. It’s important to pay attention to her behavior and the way she interacts with you. That can help you determine whether or not she’s pretending to love you. 

9.  She constantly talks about her ex

When someone constantly talks about former relationships, it may be an indication that they’re not ready to fully commit.

In the early stages of a relationship, it’s normal to discuss your past relationships. You can get to know each other better and build a deeper connection if you talk about them. Your partner may not be ready to focus on the present moment if they keep bringing up their ex.

It’s natural to still have feelings for someone after a breakup, but if your partner is still hung up on the past, it could be a sign that they may never fully commit to you. If they’re constantly reminiscing about memories with their ex and can’t seem to focus on the present, it could be a sign that they aren’t truly invested in your relationship.

10. She’s not open and honest with you. 

Love should be a two-way street. That means both you and your partner should be open and honest with each other about how you’re feeling. If your partner is not open and honest with you, it could be a sign that she’s not as invested in the relationship as you are.

Among the many signs that a woman might be pretending to love you, one that is the most telling is if she doesn’t seem to be open and honest with you. It may be a sign that she isn’t as committed to the relationship as you are if she isn’t willing to share her feelings, thoughts, and experiences. She might even be pretending to love you if she doesn’t seem to be as committed to the relationship as you are. 

One way to tell if your partner is not as invested in the relationship as you are is to pay attention to how they communicate with you. Do they seem to be holding back from expressing themselves? Do they avoid conversations about serious topics or future plans? Do they avoid being vulnerable with you? If so, these could all be signs that she may not be as invested in the relationship as you are.

11. She doesn’t make sacrifices for you. 

Love and relationships are complex, and it can be incredibly difficult to tell if someone is truly in love with you or just pretending. While it’s never a good idea to jump to conclusions, there are some signs that can give you a clue as to whether the person is really into you or just going through the motions. One such sign is whether or not she’s willing to make sacrifices for you.

When someone is truly in love, they’ll go out of their way to make you happy. They’ll give up time with their friends or even make sacrifices to be able to spend time with you. They might rearrange their schedule to accommodate you, and make all sorts of concessions for you. If your partner never makes sacrifices for you, it could be a sign that she’s only pretending to be in love with you.

A lack of willingness to make sacrifices for you could also mean that she doesn’t value the relationship. Maybe she’s not as invested in the relationship as you are. This could ultimately lead to a breakup, so it’s important to pay attention to this warning sign. If she’s not willing to make any sacrifices for you, it could be a sign that she’s not in it for the long haul.

12. She’s always trying to change you.

Aside from that, it is also important to look out for signs of her trying to change you in any way. If your partner is constantly telling you to do things differently, or trying to mold you into the person she wants you to be, this is a clear sign that she is pretending to love you. 

When someone truly cares for you, they will encourage you to be yourself and appreciate the person that you are, rather than trying to change you.

13. She doesn’t take your opinion into consideration. 

If you’re in a relationship, it’s important to make sure that your partner respects and takes your opinion into consideration. While it may not always be easy to agree on everything, it is essential that your partner actively listens to your thoughts and feelings. When someone is truly in love, they will generally make an effort to ensure that both their opinion and your opinion are respected.

So, when is it a sign that she is pretending to love you? If your partner is not taking your opinion into consideration, it could be a sign that they are not as invested in the relationship as they are letting on. If they are in a relationship with you simply for the sake of convenience, they may not take your opinion into consideration as you become more of an accessory than a partner.

14. She is always moody and distant

She doesn't initiate contct

It’s hard to tell when someone is pretending to love you, but there are some tell-tale signs that can alert you to her true intentions. One of the most obvious is her moods and behavior; if she’s always moody and distant, then chances are she’s not being genuine.

It’s normal to have bad days, and everyone has different ways of expressing their feelings. But if your partner frequently appears to be uninterested or acts bored or distant when you’re together, then that’s a sure sign that her feelings for you may not be genuine.

It’s possible that she’s playing games and putting on an act, instead of being honest about how she feels about you. She might be afraid to let you know that she’s not feeling the same way, or she may be manipulating you with her moods. Either way, it’s a clear sign that she’s not being true to her feelings.

15. She’s not supportive of your goals.

One of the essential components of a successful and healthy relationship is support. If your partner is not supportive of your goals and ambitions, it’s a sign she might not be in it for the long haul. A partner should support your dreams, be there to cheer you on, and help you reach your goals.

When your partner shows lack of support for your goals, this is an indication that she doesn’t care about your long-term future. This could be in the form of her not wanting to hear about your plans, or not being interested in investing in your goals. For example, if you’re trying to start a business and she doesn’t want to hear anything about it, it could be a sign that she’s not investing in your future together.

When your partner’s lack of support for your goals starts to manifest itself more openly, it’s even more of a red flag. If she’s actively discouraging you from pursuing something that’s important to you, it could be a sign that she’s not invested in the relationship. This could look like her making fun of your ideas, belittling them, or suggesting you find something else to focus on.

16. She doesn’t show any trust in you.

Trust is a key ingredient in any loving relationship. When someone is truly in love with you, they will trust you and believe in you. It may take a while to build that trust, but once it’s there, it should be strong and unwavering.

If your partner doesn’t seem to trust you, this could be a sign that she’s not really invested in the relationship. She may be pretending to love you out of obligation or social pressure.

She may be hesitant to open up to you or share her feelings. She may give you the cold shoulder or avoid talking about deeper topics, like the future of the relationship.

She may also be evasive when you confront her about her lack of trust. She may make excuses or brush off your concerns. She may avoid serious conversations or be dismissive of your feelings.

If your partner is exhibiting any of these behaviors, it’s a sign she may not be in love with you. If you want to salvage the relationship, it’s important to talk to her about her lack of trust.

17. She’s not interested in spending time with you. 

When someone is truly in love with you, they will want to be around you as much as possible. If a woman is only pretending to love you, she will likely be too busy or too tired to make spending time with you a priority. Of course, there may be times when she is legitimately too busy or too tired, but if this is occurring often, it’s a red flag that she may not actually be interested in being with you.

A woman who is genuinely interested in spending time with you will usually make it a priority to make time for you, no matter how busy she is. She will also be excited to spend time with you and will make plans accordingly. If she’s always making excuses or acting disinterested when you suggest spending time together, it’s a clear sign that she’s not really interested in being with you.

18. She’s not comfortable around you. 

Have you ever felt like your girl is not as comfortable around you as she should be? Does she make awkward eye contact or avoid physical contact with you? Do you feel like she’s not really into you, or like she’s not fully present when you’re together?

There are a lot of signs she is pretending to love you and one of the most telling signs that she is pretending to love you is that she’s not comfortable around you. Love is built on trust, and a girl that is truly in love with you will be comfortable being herself around you. If your girl is hesitant or nervous when you’re around, it’s likely that she’s not as interested in you as she says.

When you’re around, does your girl seem to be more concerned about how she looks or how you’re perceiving her, rather than being her comfortable, natural self? If she’s constantly stressing about the way she looks, or trying to act differently when you’re around, these can be signs that she’s not as into you as you thought.

19. She always criticize you

girl pretending to love you

No matter how hard you try, it’s hard to ignore the signs that she is pretending to love you. There are many small, subtle signs, and one of the most obvious is her constant criticism.

When a woman is genuinely in love with someone, she will be supportive, understanding and encouraging. But if she is pretending to love you, she will become critical, judgmental and unsupportive. She may use her criticism as a way to make herself feel better and to mask her own insecurities.

If your partner is constantly finding fault with your actions and decisions, it’s a red flag that she is not being authentic in her love

What can you do if she is pretending to love you

When it comes to relationships, it can be hard to tell if someone is truly in love with you or just pretending. It can be heartbreaking when you discover that someone you care about is not being genuine.

If you think the person you’re in a relationship with is pretending to love you, there are a few steps you can take.

1. Talk to her

In order to make the best decision for you and your relationship, it is important that you communicate directly with her. 

Ask her directly if she really loves you or not. Don’t be afraid to hear the truth because if she does, you must act on it. You can then decide to mend the relationship or move on.

2. Pay attention to her actions

A woman who truly loves you will show her love for you in her actions. You can spot signs of affection when she spends time with you, cares for you, and is kind throughout the way she talks to you. 

Nevertheless, if her actions fail to go along with her words, you can tell that she only pretends to be in love with you.

3. Don’t blame yourself

The reasons behind her pretending to love you may be a bit more complicated than we know. Don’t blame yourself for not being able to find it sooner. 

She may have a hidden agenda for pretending to love you or she may just be too scared to tell you the truth. It depends on how you interpret it.

4. Take some time

Consider taking some time off to think about the situation and to see what you really want out of the relationship. 

You can decide that it’s better for you to move on and find someone who really loves you, if that is possible.

5. Reach out for help

If you’re feeling overwhelmed by the situation, seek professional help. A counselor or therapist can help you to sort through your feelings and come to a decision about the relationship.

By taking the right steps, you can figure out if she’s really in love with you or if she’s pretending. Don’t be afraid to ask for help if you need it.

FAQs on Signs she is pretending to love you

How can I tell if a girl is just keeping me around or pretending to love me?


There are several signs that a girl might be keeping you around without really investing in the relationship. One of the biggest signs is if she seems disinterested in your life, hobbies, and future plans. If she’s not willing to commit to making plans with you or seems to be avoiding talking about your future together, it might be a sign that she’s not truly invested in the relationship.

It can be difficult to tell if someone is pretending to love you, but there are a few signs to look out for. If she seems to be defensive or evasive when you ask about her feelings for you, or if she’s not interested in getting to know you on a deeper level, it could be a sign that she’s not truly invested in the relationship. Additionally, if she seems to be avoiding talking about your future together or isn’t putting in effort to maintain the relationship, it might be a sign that she’s just pretending to love you.

Are there any other signs to look out for?


Yes, there are several other signs that a girl might be keeping you around or pretending to love you. These include a lack of effort to maintain the relationship, a lack of interest in your life and hobbies, and a general sense that she’s not really invested in the relationship. If you’re feeling uncertain about your relationship, it’s important to trust your instincts and have an honest conversation with your partner.


What should I do if I suspect that a girl is just keeping me around or pretending to love me?


If you suspect that a girl is just keeping you around or pretending to love you, it’s important to have an honest conversation with her about your concerns. Communication is key in any relationship, and if you’re feeling uncertain about the future of your relationship, it’s important to address it. Remember, you deserve to be with someone who truly loves and values you.

Is it common for someone to pretend to love you?


As easy as it may seem, pretending to care for someone else for a variety of reasons may appear common. Many people pretend to love someone else for all kinds of reasons, such as avoiding conflict or trying to avoid loneliness

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About author

Articles

Alex Marz is a self-help and relationship expert who understands and loves the individual's philosophy and wants nothing more than to repair the broken relationships, spark chemistry, and make you succeed in your life.
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